50 Shades of Garbage

If you’re a mom and reading (or enjoying) the blockbuster 50 Shades of Gray, shame on you. Not only are you setting a horrible example for your daughter (or son), you will embarrass her if her friends find out, you will be participating in the moral demise of your culture and most importantly, you will be hurting yourself.

These are strong words but indulge me with an explanation. Every woman feels lust. That’s a good thing, because it keeps us wanting to be closer to our mates. But when we take that lust and channel it into voyeuristic, distorted and downright unhealthy ways, we end up emotionally dull and even depressed. I have never heard a woman who has read pornography (or “erotica as some of you who play mind games with yourselves), say that it enhanced her life. Not one. But I have listened to many parents (mothers and fathers) who have felt the intense pain of emotional and family destruction because of it. Don’t fool yourself, it’s powerful stuff. And the place that it takes you is nowhere good. I can guarantee that.

I believe that it is a parent’s responsibility to keep their children from humiliation. When a mother has an affair or a father is found cheating on his income tax, they aren’t the only ones harmed. The children stand in the wings and endure tremendous embarrassment. There are so many ways in which we unwittingly hurt our children, refusing to read pornography is a really easy way to avoid this.

But I say shame on you who read for another reason. Studies have clearly shown that reading or watching pornography is intimately tied up in child abuse. No, not everyone who reads becomes a child abuser. That’s not the point. But ask yourself if you want to participate in something which causes so many others to hurt children? When you read porn, you entertain yourself with the same material as child abusers. Is that really something that you want to do? I sat in court recently testifying against a father who was sexually abusing his eight year old son and baby daughter. He admitted that he read or watched porn regularly. He started off with the “soft stuff” but wound up with harder core porn.

We are living in a time when we need strong women to stand up for what is good and right for ourselves and for our children. Doing this requires that we exercise self control and live a life of discipline. Every one of us feels lust, but we need to respect it and make sure that it goes in a healthy direction, not a destructive one.

Some of you will be mad at this post so I ask you to dig deeply and ask what makes you mad. Is it because you really disagree or because a nerve has been struck? My job is to advocate for kids and I know for sure that helping moms keep garbage out of their lives does the job. Which of you moms are willing to do the same for yourselves and your friends?