First of all… Thank you!! I came across your Twitter account about two years ago and I truly enjoy your articles and posts.
I am now a single mom of twin 2 and 1/2 year old boys. I have been raising them on my own with the help of my parents and nannies since they were 9 months old when their dad left us.
As time has gone on he has made it more and more difficult for us to coparent our boys. He moved in with his current girlfriend about 4 months after we split up and the reason I bring that up is I’ve noticed many of his parenting decisions are based off of his current relationship and they are not in the children’s best interest. For example he demoralizes me as a person and as a mother thru emails by picking on anything I tell him about the children (i.e. They are sick with the stomach bug). That becomes my fault because I’m a horrible mother who neglects her children’s and doesn’t feed them the right foods and isn’t around to even know what they eat.
I work very hard as a director of 12 hospitals at the age of 33, my ex husband doesn’t financially support his children whatsoever. Not even a bag of diapers or a gallon of milk. It all falls on my shoulders and has since they were born. He opened a business and is using his girlfriend to hide his income by paying her and not collecting a paycheck.
I’m tired Meg. Very tired. He sees the boys 5 days a month and almost ever two weeks I start getting anxiety thinking about what will the next message say? I walk on pins and needles and double check everything I do because I don’t want to give him ground to harass me about the boys. Most recently he threaten to take me back to court to get the boys 50/50 and start making me pay him child support. The court has ordered him to pay 50% of the work related child care cost but he refuses to pay and hasn’t sent them a dime.
Help!!! I don’t know what to do with him and I know it’s effecting my ability to be an even better mom. I want to give my boys the best life and an honest loving nurturing foundation so they can grow up to be respectful God loving men with integrity and love as the core of everything they do.
I don’t even know if this message will get to you but I could sure use some serious advice because I know what he is doing isn’t right.
PS our divorce was due to domestic violence and I could bear the thought of raising two innocent lives in that environment.