Hi Dr. Meg,
Tonight I overheard my 7-year-old daughter singing a song with the lyrics “I’m so sexy and I know it…” I immediately turned around with the classic look of parental astonishment and asked, “What did you just sing?”
I proceeded to have the “Who? What? Where?” conversation with her. I am fairly confident that I did NOT do this all that well, but I told her that those are grown-up words and kids do not need to be talking like that.
The thing that has me completely baffled was how the conversation ended…her asking me, “Daddy, what does sexy mean?”
After picking up my jaw, I said what every dad says in that situation: “I think we need to go ask your mother that one.” I did try to weasel out of it by getting her mom to intervene and the stall tactic has worked (at least for now) since she forgot about it, but I am left trying to figure out how to define “sexy” to a 7-year-old.
My wife and I were talking and she had a great point that it is my job to define it and her job to be a healthy example of it. I want to set the correct tone early, and I went back to your book Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters, but nothing jumped out at me for this specific question.
Can you please give me some advice on how to define this to her in terms that will be accurate, appropriate and helpful to a 7-year-old girl?