Dad: You Are Her First Love

Father’s Day is one month from today! During the next 30 days or so, I’ll be posting excerpts and highlights from my book, Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters: The 30-Day Challenge.

Dads, have you taken The 30-Day Challenge?

THIS SUMMER IS A PERFECT TIME TO BUILD A BETTER RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR DAUGHTER.

Don’t miss my Father’s Day Special at the online store. Details are at the end of the post.

YOU ARE HER FIRST LOVE

Our culture ties girls in knots, and your daughter is no exception.

No matter how hard you try to isolate her from the ugly influence of a world that sexualizes and degrades women, you can’t. And since you are the primary means by which she develops a healthy sense of beauty and sexuality, when it comes to shaping these in her, it’s on your shoulders.

When it comes to loving your daughter, remember these important ideas:

• Tell her that you love her. Tell her as frequently as feels natural to you.

• Express adoration. Let her know that she is the apple of your eye.

• Believe in her. Most girls, especially during the teen years, feel terribly inadequate, dumb, and unattractive. You need to really amp up your positive comments during the tough times and help her combat those feelings.

• Don’t remark on her weight—EVER. No pet names for parts of her body, no calling her “sexy,” and no telling her that she’s chubby or that she should lose a few pounds.

• Don’t remark on her looks very often. I know that this feels counter-intuitive. Shouldn’t every girl know that her dad thinks she’s beautiful? Of course; but don’t overdo it. You don’t want her to feel that her appearance is a priority to you.

• Use lots of words of encouragement and affection. Girls use more words, and they bond through words. Girls feel that words connect them with others.

This post is adapted from “Love—the Dos and Don’ts,” Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters: The 30-Day Challenge (2012).

FATHER’S DAY SPECIAL

When you order my Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters DVD study, you’ll get The 30-Day Challenge free plus free shipping. Order here.